How The War Will Definitely End Not
by TRIGGER M00NSHIELD
Summary: Madara attempts to take over the world to the tune of Beezleboss. Can or will the kages stop him? Probably not... Rated T for language


**Okay okay, I know I should be updating Operation: Kill Tobi or Hidans Wonderful Adventure to Konoha etc... But I'm still working on getting motivated to do it and hopefully by writing this is will boost me up a bit.**  
**This is a oneshot that I've had floating around in my head forever and I swear to god Rhcpftw if you review and tell me its ridiculous I reserve the rights to agree with you and then behead you.**  
**Enjoy it anyway... Its fucking stupid.**  
**And you may not understand it unless you have watched The Pick of Destiny...**

* * *

"I AM COMPLEEEEETE!"

A few thousand ninja turned around in their battle and gazed up in shock at the new threat that stood before them.  
The five kages tilted their head up at the man and gaped in awe.  
Wasn't he supposedly dead? How was this possible?  
Eyes wide, Tsunade cried out, "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck!"

Smirking down upon them all, Madara Uchiha raised a hand to the sky in glory and pointed at the gathering crowd below him with triumph.  
His next words sent a shiver of fear down the backs of everyone present, for this was THE Madara Uchiha.  
The devil incarnate.

"Yes, you are fucked! Shit out of luck. This world will be mine and you're first in line! I was brought back from the dead and now you shall all die-!"

"Wait, wait, wait..."

Face not betraying a single emotion, the Kazekage Gaara stepped forward with his hands raised.  
Madara raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms at being interrupted but allowed the youth to continue none the less.  
Eyes held in a slight glare, Gaara continued,

"You motherfucker..."

Madara growled and the other four kage raised an eyebrow at what was either a very brave or very stupid display by their youngest.

"We challenge you to a jutsu-off! Give us one chance to knock your socks off."

At Gaaras proposition, Madara looked truly annoyed and made it known as he began to stomp his foot and throw a miniature tantrum.

"FUCK... FUCK... FUUUUUCK!"

The Mizukage glanced sidelong at Gaara and murmured to him, "Are you sure you know what your doing?"  
Gaaras eyes flicked to meet Meis briefly in acknowledgment of her question, but he didn't answer.  
The outspoken Raikage was about to demand a response when a loud growl brought their attention back to Madara, who was at this point, rubbing his temples and what was obviously a growing headache.

"My Uchiha pride prevents me from declining a jutsu-off challenge. What are your terms? Whats the catch?"

Boldly stepping forward, Gaara replied, "If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell. And also you will have to pay for the damage you have made here."

Not bothering to point out that not only did he have NO money and that there is no possible way that he could pay for damages from HELL, Madara rolled his eyes and asked, "And if I win?"  
Gaara seemed to pause for a brief second in contemplation, during which time the Raikage stepped up and answered, "Then you can take Killer B back to hell..."  
Behind him, all 4 kage cried out, "What!?"  
Tsnuade slapped the back of his head in fury, "You are sacrificing your own brother?"  
"Trust me, Tsunade, its the only way."  
"What the fuck are you talking about!?"  
Sighing in exasperation, the Raikage turned to face her and whispered under his breath, "Bee wont stop rapping and he will annoy Madara so much that he win get kicked out!"  
The Tsuchikages mouth dropped open.  
What a stupid plan...  
Gaara raised a brow, "And if Madara decides to kill him instead?"  
The Raikage cleared his throat and ignored the massive flaw in his plan, instead turning to face Madara, "Are we in agreement?"

Confident in his ability to win and not really caring for the consequences, the Uchiha replied, "Fine. Let the jutsu-off begin!"  
His maniacal laughter floated down from the platform on which he was perched as thousands of trees began to shoot from the ground, growing at speeds not possible in reality.  
"I'm an Uchiha, I love jutsus!"  
The kage bounced away as giant flowers blossomed beneath their feet.  
"Check this technique its fucking crazy!"  
As a giant Susanoo rose skyward, the 5 kages could do nothing but stare in shock and awe at the masterful display.  
They jumped in terror as the Susanoo jolted to the side and with a swing of its giant sword, cut a mountain range in half.  
"I'm Madara, I can do what I want! Whatever I've got, I'm gonna flaunt... There's never been a jutsu-off that I've ever lost."  
Gaara grinded his teeth nervously.  
Perhaps he had gotten them in too deep.  
As Madaras Susanoo ceased its movements, the great Uchiha himself looked down upon them with an outstretched arm, encouraging them to show him what they had.  
Turning to his companions, the Raikage growled, "Come on, lets bring the thunder."  
Tsunade looked up at him with wide eyes and whispered back,  
"Theres just no way that we can win, that is an epic beast... His jutsus are too strong because he's not a mortal man..."  
Gaara grabbed her shoulders and shook her out of her fright,  
"Goddamit Tsunade, he's going to take over the world, he's going to steal our hard won peace, unless we bust an awesome-epic-super jutsu."  
Mei placed a comforting hand on Tsunades shoulder and murmured,  
"Come on... We've been through so much stuff.."  
The Tsuchikage nodded, "We had to put up with Danzo."  
"That was rough..." Gaara agreed.  
In unison, the kages glanced up at Madara, "Now its time to blow this fucker down..."

They sprang into action at the same time, sand poured from Gaaras gourd as he cried,  
"Come on, Tsunade now its time to blow the Uchiha down."  
Streaks and lines painted themselves across her face from the small diamond on her forehead as the Hokage replied, "I hear you Gaara, its time to blow the Uchiha down."  
Electricity crackled around the Raikage as he hollered, "I'll light up this place, cause its time for a show down!"  
The earth moved as the Tsuchikage raised his arms and cried, "We're gonna beat ya, you Uchiha!"  
The Mizukage leaped forward, adding "No doubt about it, our jutsus rock!"  
Gaaras sand spilled out, "I have some sand bars, we will blow your mind. We will defeat you, for all mankind!"

"You hold the sceptre! We hold the key! You have a Susanoo, we have a Naruto!"

"We have a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto, a Naruto!"

Madara, whose headache had been increasing tenfold, had finally had enough.  
Silencing them all with a swish of his hand, he cried out, "You guys are fucking lame... I'm taking over the world now-OW FUCK! My fucking forehead!"  
True to the Kages word, a wild Naruto appeared and punched Madara Uchiha smack in the middle of his forehead.  
It would seem that saying the name "Naruto" too many times will summon him.  
A windstyle rasen-shuriken billowed out above the orange clad ninjas palm and as he brought it down upon the demons head, he hollered, "From whence you came, you shall remain, until someone justsohappenstosummonyouagain!"  
And with that, Madara Uchiha was blasted into thousands of pieces...  
And the war was over...

That is how Naruto is going to end.

THE END...

**So yes, I know this was ridiculous... And I got lazy towards the end.**  
**Tell me what you think anyway XD**  
**Happy Late Easter to you all anyways. And I apologise for not updating as much as I should...  
As always, leave your rates, reviews, complaints and pathetic excuses after the beep!  
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep**


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